For the birds

Birds? This is for you. As you’ve probably noticed, we’ve found a centerpiece for our environmentally superior non-lawn. And let me tell you, it wasn’t easy for my daughter and me to set it up. The d**n thing comes in two pieces, but each weighs about 70-80 pounds because this isn’t one of those plastic jobs. Oh no. This is stone. Nothing but the best for our birds. And what happens? How do you react? It’s been in place for almost a week now, and as far as I can tell not one bird has even been near the thing. Yes I know it’s November, but we’ve had some nice warm days. Would it kill you to stick in a foot? Dip in a beak, at least?